These Are My Confessions

I have some confessions to make.  No, not these kind of confessions...but I do feel really guilty like I've been cheating on myself and my health...

Ever since our last trip to Tahoe, I haven't been 100% following my diet, and eating foods that I shouldn't be.  Not at every meal, not all the time.  Just little bits here and there. I have successfully added some foods back into my diet, but some things, like wheat, dairy and spicy foods, just don't agree with me.   

Like the time I had a cupcake sized cheesecake...

Or the time Dave and I split the nachos at Freebirds...

I didn't feel terrible each time after I ate one of these things, so I guessed that I would be ok if I was having these things occasionally, as long as they weren't part of my everyday diet.  

Over the past few days, I've noticed my energy levels were down.  My joints were hurting.  My pants were tighter.  I was stuffy.  I was PMSing badly.  Colds and flus are going around the office now that school is back in session and I was sure that I just had a touch of whatever everyone else had on top of just being a bloated, emotional woman.  

Last week was our anniversary and we took a little getaway back to Tahoe.  This time we rented a vacation house.  It was adorable and bits of it reminded me of my grandparent's house in Washington. 

The morning was nice and chilly, so Dave got us Starbucks (yay soy milk Pumpkin Spice Latte) while I cooked us a healthy breakfast of sweet potatoes, eggs, and pastured bacon.  We needed a hearty breakfast so we could go hiking later that morning.  

We drove over to Heavenly so we could do the last hiking of the season.  The calendar says it's fall, but the weather and the trees just aren't cooperating just yet.  I did find one tree that had changed colors, but it was right next to a perfectly green tree.  

I realized I forgot my hat and we stopped off at the ski shop to find one.  Isn't it so cute?  

I looked inside the hat, and noticed it had a saying inside.  I read it and just hung my head and sighed deeply.  Another random sign from the universe...a gentle reminder that I need to be pursuing what I love...and I'm not where I'm supposed to be.  

Yes, I already have makeup sweat on it.  Ugh!

We got on the Gondola and stopped off at the lookout point.  The weather was beautiful and there was a slight breeze.  Perfect for hiking. 

The sun hiding behind the fluffy clouds. 

Our traditional "hold-the-camera-out-in-front-of-you-and -take -our -own-picture" picture

Last trip, we hiked up the California side of the mountain, so this time we decided to hike up the Nevada side.  It was getting pretty warm outside, and I was having difficulty adjusting to the altitude.  My joints were hurting and I just wanted to give up a couple minutes after we started.  

               

The views overlooking Carson Valley were amazing.  I love hiking because you get to see some of the most beautiful places that you would never get to see otherwise.  

We kept on going up the trail and it was a struggle.  I was breathing hard, I was hurting, and I was exhausted.  This was so different from how I felt at our last hike up here.  Sure, it was hard, but I felt great, had great energy, and just loved it!

I was so mad at myself.  I had been doing so good.  I started feeling better, so I got too bold and felt like I could go back to eating things I normally did.  I was still being generally healthy, but I was eating small quantities of wheat and dairy and other foods here and there and it was slowly slipping me back into an unhealthy state.  

Dave was so sweet and kept asking if I was ok, if we needed to rest, or if we needed to turn around.  I was near tears.  How could I do this to myself?  I was doing so well and in a few weeks, I'm almost back were I started?  

One thing that may or may not be a good quality about me is that I'm pretty stubborn.  Today, my stubbornness was a good thing because I wouldn't give up.  I wouldn't stop.  I couldn't give up and admit defeat.  I kept on going.  

I took a picture at the end of the trail just to prove I finished.  I was tired.  I was sore.  It hurt to breathe. But I finished.  It wasn't a long hike, but it was a steep hike and the elevation kills me since where I live is practically sea level.  

After I sat down for a bit and caught my breath and drank some water, I  felt a little better and promised myself to not let this happen again.  I need to get my focus back and not be such a baby on missing out on food.  I need to not cheat on my health.  

I saw this sign on the way back, and it made me happy!  

We were hungry after our hike and instead of stopping somewhere and getting some junk food, we headed over to Sprouts and had a healthy light lunch and some fresh juice.  Fresh juice instantly makes me feel better.  As soon as I start drinking it, I feel refreshed and nourished.  

Sprouts is a cool little hippie vegetarian cafe that serves amazing, healthy food.  I wish there was a place like that where I live.  

I busted up laughing when I saw this on the wall at Sprouts.  

The next day, at the suggestion from a Heavenly employee, we headed over to the Visitor's Center to see the salmon spawning at Taylor Creek.  

It was another picture perfect day.  I was a little relieved that this ended up to be more of a walk than a hike.

There was some really interesting educational signs all along our walk talking about the Tahoe area and the wildlife.  It was sad to learn that after these fish spawn, they die.  

We kept seeing signs warning us about bears in the area, but sadly we didn't have the privilege of seeing any fishing bears.  

We made it to Taylor Creek to see the salmon.  The water was so clear and all you could see were hundreds of red salmon trying to swim upstream.  

After our little walk, we stopped at the Beacon, a cute little bar and restaurant on the lake.  I was good and avoided ordering anything I shouldn't eat.  They had amazing Rum Runners, and I think everyone should go drink them by the dozens (responsibly, of course!)

Later that night we went back to Heavenly village and had dinner.  Once again, I ate appropriately.  After dinner, we sat outside by the fireplaces and had an after dinner drink.   

We came home, refreshed, and I came home with a new perspective. I am attempting to participate in the October Unprocessed Challenge.  For me, it's much more than just a challenge to eat better, it's a necessity to feel better.  I already eat a healthy diet, I just need to remember that a night out, a vacation, or a fun event is no excuse to stray away from healing my body and feeling better.  

Weekend adventures

Dave and I took a short getaway to our favorite place, Lake Tahoe.  It's so nice to live so close to so many amazing places like Lake Tahoe, Monterey, San Francisco, and Bodega Bay.

We drove up one morning, and we made a stop in Placerville at Z-Pie.  We had always seen this place, and were intrigued, but never stopped. 

  

This place is not gluten-free, or even allergen free (for me at least), and was full of everything I shouldn't be eating. But I ate anyways.  And I suffered....but actually kinda worth it.

  

Z-Pie is a gourmet pot-pie restaurant.  The menu was small, but appealing.

I chose the southwest chicken at the recommendation of our server and Dave chose one that was on the seasonal menu.

 

The crust was flakey and crunchy, and the filling was flavorful.  The filling was rich and creamy and full of "goodies."  I found a deal that if you check in with Yelp, you get a free glass of their house red or white wine.  It wasn't the greatest wine I've ever had, but free wine is free wine! 

 

This trip we stayed with some sweet friends of ours who are lucky enough to live in Tahoe.  They have such beautiful surroundings. We BBQd steak and asparagus, and I made quinoa salad and fruit crisp.  Yummy!

I don't think I could ever get tired of this view.

No trip to Tahoe is complete without a stops at Sprouts Natural Food Cafe.  It's mostly vegetarian food, but I sure don't miss the meat when I'm there.  Their nachos are some of the best I've ever eaten.  But for this trip, we went for breakfast.  Once again, I'm not supposed to be eating this food, but my stomach actually handled it really well.  This is a sprouted wheat organic tortilla filled with black beans, brown rice, steamed eggs, jack cheese, homemade salsa, avocados, and green onions.  I'm finding that sometimes foods that are on my "no" list agree with me more when they are in a "healthy" form, as opposed to junk food.  Like spouted grains agree with me whereas a white flour cupcake does not.  Trial and error right now.  It's such an adventure learning what I can and cannot eat.  I want to recreate this breakfast every day, except a little smaller!

We spent one of the days with our friends at the beach at Emerald Bay.  The view there is so majestic.  I couldn't stop staring at the mountains on one side, the water in front of me, surrounded by a forest of green trees.  It was a picture perfect day!

The next day, Dave and I went to Heavenly Ski Resort to do some hiking.

This was a huge deal for me.  For the past several years, back injuries and being sick have left me enjoying the beauty of Tahoe from the car, the hotel or the beach, never really being able to hike or explore like I had wanted to.  I think Dave was a little skeptical when I said that I wanted to hike.  Probably because last time I couldn't make it more than a few hundred feet without being in horrible pain, chest pounding, unable to breathe.  I couldn't go on, and was upset and it just put a horrible damper on the trip.    

We went to the top of the Gondola, then went up one of the ski lifts to where the hiking trail was.  

I love this sign.  When I was first learning to ski when I was about 7 or 8, I would forget to keep my tips up.  On more than one occasion, I face-planted trying to get off the lift, and shut down the lift while the poor employees tried to get me up and out of the way of the real skiers. Although, nothing will beat the time my friend accidentally kicked off her ski while on the lift and had to be taken down the mountain to get her ski by the ski patrol on an emergency toboggan.  Oh to still have that as the biggest tragedy in my life...

It was amazing.  I haven't been up on ski trails since my dad and sister and I used to ski before he died over 20 years ago. It was such a bittersweet, healing moment for me.  Old sad memories meshing with new happy memories.  I had forgotten how much I love it up there.

Looks so different without the snow!

 

As we hiked higher and higher, the views got more and more amazing. 

Overlooking Carson Valley

Overlooking Lake Tahoe

I wish this was the view from my bedroom every morning

We got to about a half way point of our hike that was also the start of a ski run.  The view was breathtaking. 

 

Pinnacle.  The highest point.  A lofty peak.

 

We stopped right by the sign to take a little rest.  I sat on a bench while Dave wandered into the danger zone to take some pictures. 

As I sat on the bench, enjoying the view and the silence of the mountain, and all the sudden this wave of emotion overcame me.  I was sitting on top (well almost) of the mountain of one of the most beautiful places, and my favorite place, on earth.  Somewhere I have previously not been able to go because I was always in so much pain.  Because my asthma was always so bad.  Because I was always having some sort of stomach distress.  I sat there sobbing.  But these were tears of joy. 

 I could finally go somewhere I had always wanted to go.  

I was finally feeling better enough to do something so physical.  

I am finally starting to reap the benefits of working so hard at my healing.  

I am finally getting my life back. 

We kept on hiking, all the way to the top of the mountain, enjoying so much of the natural beauty that the Sierra Mountains have to offer.

More dead trees

Dead trees are so pretty...

We finally reached our destination.  

The top of the mountain, elevation 10,400 feet. 

Sky Express ski lift

The top of the mountain!

We made it!!! See how happy I am???

The "You are Here" sign at the top of the mountain showing skiers all the different trails. We were up at the very top where the red circle is. 

We stayed at the top of the mountain for a while, just enjoying the view.  Visited with a couple from Kentucky who were very jealous that we live so close to such beauty. 

As we made our way back down the mountain, I felt such a sense of pride and accomplishment.  Sure, to most people this was a short hike, but to me, I conquered a mountain.  It was tough for me, but I didn't have an asthma attack, I didn't feel like I was going to pass out.  I felt tired, yet invigorated.

Walking down back towards Pinnacles.

I can only imagine how beautiful this trail is to ski each winter!!!

On the mountain, I made myself a challenge:  to ski one more time.  Not this season, but hopefully the next...the '13/'14 season.  I don't care if I am in the ski school with 4 year olds, learning how to pizza and french fry all over again, but I'm gonna do it again!